I don’t like to receive good wishes, and I wish them myself only when no other present is possible or appropriate. It is because I feel how empty the wishes are. Can a good wish change the reality? What I need is a way to present luck in a more realistic, material way. Money don’t buy you luck, as we all …
Category Archives: personal-life
Simple Girl from USSR
Once upon a time, in a small Russian village with a Tatar name, a baby-girl Natasha was born to a family of farmers. For her parents, Maria and Pyotr, she was the fourth child, and not the last one. They were quite prosperous; they had a good house, and their land was so large and …
Heart, ripped
Do you know this feeling, when a tooth aches for a such long time that you want to rip it out of your mouth? Because you’re already OK with living without a tooth instead of enduring the pain… I have this very feeling in the last time, and it is not a tooth but my …
Contrast people
Who are you: Human-Machine, Human-Symbol, Human-Nature or Human-Human?
1980
USSR in 1980 was a funny place. By this time, only a minority had really believed in communism, but many “simple” people had nevertheless thought that their life was still better than life standard of the most other nations. After all, soviet people had a guaranteed job (in fact, everyone has been even REQUIRED to have a job; those …
Fireworks
A little more impressions from the Pyronale in Berlin. This was my first time I saw fireworks live. Well, of course I saw and even did myself the ordinary New Year fireworks. And I’ve also seen some professional fireworks, but from a greater distance. But this time, I was so close. And it was WOW. …
Yeah. Life.
I like the saying of my close friend that goes “Жизнь не удалась, но попытку засчитали”. It is hard for me to translate, but it is something along the lines “I’ve wasted [one more] try to live by spoiling it from the very beginning”. On the other hand, they say “Жизнь дерьмо, но мы с …
In the Church
I’ve recently been in a church – for the first time in my life not as a tourist. It was build around 900 years ago, and looks really like this from outside. At first, I was confused, which one of the many doors to use and if I am, as a non-christ, supposed to enter the church at all. …
Viktor Tsoi
Today, 19 years ago, Viktor Tsoi died in a car accident. He was one of the leading USSR rockers of 80ies. I was a teenager at that time and he was my idol. I used to come back from the school, lie down to the bed and start hearing his songs. Most of the days in the …
Tenderness
In the University where I’ve studied, there is a student theatre called Mannequin. Several years ago, they played a performance based on the short story of Henri Barbusse named Tenderness. I like the original story; so I want to share it with you. It is tiny but emotionally intense, dark but romantic, not really realistic, but with …